Mock the Fic: The Chick and The Surfer
Posted by BadCastleFic
Let’s take a crack at mocking an AU fic. Although in my opinion all the crap fics we mock here are AU, but this one specifically mentions the fact that it is an AU. I shall warn you, this has a rant by me about a certain theme park that shall remain nameless in this section that I hate and want my money back from going to visit there. Meanwhile back on the ranch, this fic sure is such a fun one to mock. So let’s sit around the camp fire and hear about the stories of what if Kate Beckett…
Disclaimer: I do not own Castle, Andrew W. Marlow and ABC do.
Thank-God they do because I’d hate to see what you would do with the show if it was in your hands.
Author’s Note: Total AU story idea. A random story idea that wouldn’t leave me alone.
This is what bothers you at night? I’d hate to see what idea’s you forget about.
What if Kate’s mother had not been murdered and both Rick and Kate had different careers. No Sorenson or Demming in this story.
No Demming? 😦
A/N 2: First chapter is a set up of what is to come. I apologize for making Kate, Lanie, or Madison a bit OCC.
They are Obsessive Compulsive Cats? Orange County Choppers? Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics?
Beta’d by: Beckett NYPD
Well then I demand perfection!
Life is good. Kate Beckett and her friends Lanie Parish and Madison Queller were enjoying the California sun.
Oh good for them. That’s just wonderful.
Kate’s parents gave Kate and her two best friends a three-travel package to California for her, Lanie and Madison as a graduation gift.
Wow, and to think all I got for graduation was a blue topaz ring and a card.
It was natural for them to go together as they have been inseparable since grade school.
Well I’m sure it would be since I’m sure her parents bought it as a travel package for them to go together!
They spent one week in San Diego and Los Angeles and two weeks in Northern California.
In San Diego they went to Sea World,
Ugh, don’t remind me how much I hate Sea World. Most disappoint theme park ever! Don’t even get me started on this place. I could rant for hours. I’m double sure Castle would never subjugate his daughter to going to Sea World, let alone Kate Beckett lowering herself to go there. Oh and I call it Puke World because I swear some kid always throws up there.
watched the dolphins perform and visited the different animal exhibits as well as having fun on the rides and getting soaked in the process.
Like OMG they did everything! Totally awesome! Too bad it was at Puke World.
They also went and checked out Julian, a century’s old mining town and the three of them stuck together in a self-guided tour.
So they guided themselves around the town?
They wrapped up their stay in San Diego by visiting Torrey Pines State Park, enjoying the breathtaking views of the Pacific whilst having a picnic.
Boring! Wake me up when this is over.
The two days that they were in L.A. the trio went to Museum of Modern West (which Kate had insisted on going because she was the art major)
Wow, what a boring trip they are going on. Where’s the booze? The drugs? The strippers?
the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and of course they did some shopping (or window shopping on Rodeo Drive).
Still boring! No parties to go to?
Once they made their way up the coast to beautiful Northern California, they decided to go to Santa Cruz first.
Isn’t Santa Cruz more in the middle of the coast of California? Hardly north.
It was there Kate’s life changed.
Oh. My. God! Her life changed? Did she break a nail?
While in Santa Cruz, the trio stayed at a comfortable motel.
Oh darn, motel and not a hotel. I sure hope it was a Motel 6. Better yet let’s make it a La Quinta.
After getting beach recommendations from the front desk concierge, the three of them headed out to the beach after breakfast.
You know what La Quinta means in Spanish? Denny’s in the parking lot! I’m sure they ate their breakfast there. Food poisoning anyone?
As the trio sunbathed when Kate suddenly said, “I am up for learning how to surf, you guys up for it?”
You might rethink that after eating at Denny’s. I’d hate to puke in the ocean while surfing.
Lanie turned her head over to look at Kate with hesitance.
“Are you sure it’s safe?” asked Lanie.
It’s totally not! You should wait at least five hours after eating Denny’s food before swimming.
“Why not? I thought you were the adventurous type.”
“Uh you are most gutsy then me sometimes.”
We shall see about those guts once she pukes them back up.
“Oh come on, it’s a once in a life time opportunity.”
I hardly call doing something like surfing at the age of twenty-something as a once in a lifetime opportunity.
“Yeah it is a good way to meet cute guys too,” said Madison causing Kate and Lanie to laugh.
Giggle giggle giggle.
“Well I guess we could,” said Lanie reluctantly.
“Okay then let’s go!” exclaimed Kate.
YAY! Let’s go puking in the ocean!
When they had their stuff packed up, they went to the closest surf shop.
Once they had had signed up, paid for a beginner lesson, and rented the gear when they heard a suave voice, “Hello ladies.”
When all three looked up, they almost fainted.
That’s what will happen when you eat one of those skillet breakfasts from Denny’s.
A/N 3: Thanks for reading Chapter 1 of “The Chick and The Surfer”. Reviews are appreciated!
My word, how many freakin author notes are needed in this fic?
Posted on September 9, 2010, in AriesOx17, Uncategorized and tagged Alternative Universe, Author, California, Castle, Kate Beckett, Northern California, San Diego, SeaWorld. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.