Category Archives: 3

Mock the Fic: Tell Me Why You Left That Night


Oh Song fics, such a tool of the 90’s. And look, someone  is writing another one, and it begs to be mocked. I just couldn’t resist.

Stats: Tell Me Why You Left That Night Author: WriterHorse32 Summary: Castle is gone. Kate works at a club on Fridays. What will happen when she asks the simple question. Why did you leave that night? Rating: K+

Sporks to your eyes: 3

Puke Bags: 2

Kate was at the club she worked at on Fridays.

Since when has she worked at a club? Isn’t that a conflict of interest for her cop job?

She knew Espositio and Ryan wouldn’t like it and the captain would kill her,

Really? Really?

but ever since Castle left the night after his 2 ex-wives murders were solved that she didn’t care what they thought.


Wait, what? Castle’s wives were murdered? What?

Read the rest of this entry

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Mock the Fic: Runaway Dream part 1


This is a piece that just screams, mock me! Please mock me! Its written by a 14 year old writer who pulls the biggest Mary Sue of all time and inserts herself into the story. How could we not mock a story that starts out with a 14 year old becoming a detective?

Stats: Title:Runaway Dream Author: NinjaaGurl Summary: this started because of a dream i had.the main point is what would happen if a 14 year old was a homicide detective (BCF: 14 year old homicide detective? WTF?) Rating: T

Prologue

The name’s Harris. Michelle Harris (A/N yes that is my real name.)

Congratulations Michelle Harris, you just because America’s newest Mary Sue Princess! And might I say, very Mary Sue of you to name the character after yourself.


I am the youngest homicide detective in history. I am only 14 years old and by some fascinating connection to the mayor (anonymous I might add) I am a true cop, gun and badge included.

Right. This must be in Down Town, NY too, right? Do I even need to mention how wrong and stupid it is to think of a 14 year old as a homicide detective? Did you just use your gym class grade to get you out of the academy? And did your

You may be wondering how this came to be so I’m going to tell you. My story starts New Years Eve, one year ago.

Of course it does.

Chapter One: Unhappy New Year. Read the rest of this entry

Mock the Fic: I can watch him walk away


Oh boy ladies and gentlemen. This next mock is a walking HR nightmare! Montgomery making the team strip to their underwear in the precinct. While this might sound like the best orgy fic story ever, it’s not. No sex, and just horrible horrible writing.

Stats: Title: I can watch him walk away Author: DecemberL. Rose Summary: Another one shot. Completely unrealistic, Can Beckett just watch Castle walk away after declaring his feeling to her, yes she can. Again, I do not own any part of Castle. Rating: T

Sporks to your eyes: 3

Puke Bags: a truck load!

The boys had a little bet going on, Who could solve their case first, Beckett and Castle or Ryan and Esposito.

YES! The Who is going to be in this story, that would be the only reason why its capitalized!

They had a little score to settle seeing as the last time they tried this no one won.

Tried what? Inviting The Who? Damn rock band for not wanting to be with the gang.

But this time was no different. In the end Montgomery had figured out how to solve each of their cases, and therefore he was the one to win the bet in the end.

Okay. I thought Castle solved the last murders when they did the whole betting thing the first time.

Captain Roy Montgomery had never been a betting man but today he was feeling a bit puckish and needed a good laugh.

Feeling puckish? Please tell me Puck from Glee isn’t in this. I can’t stand it if I see his fauxhawk again. Read the rest of this entry

Mock the Fic: A Drunken Stupor


Congradulations! This blog is so popular that we have people wanting to be guest Mockers! Awesome! Our First Guest Mocker goes to: BadFic, who quickly mocked this lovely gem of a story out of the depths of fanfiction.net. Lets hope this guest Mocking position doesn’t go to their head and do some damage.

Story Stats: A Drunken Stupor. The Author (is a repeat offender): The jackall. Rated: M (I guess thats an M for Man Drinking? Sure was no sex in this story).

“A Drunken Stupor: Castle has a little drinky drinky.” –The Jackall

BF note: Uh, clearly Castle wasn’t the only one…

A/N: I wanted to try a one shotter I had come to me while I was trying to go to sleep. Enjoy!

WTF is a ‘one shotter’? I think prefer body shotters myself. And I wouldn’t have been able to sleep with this on my mind either. Nightmares are serious business.

He was sitting in the bar drinking away his sorrows when he saw her walk in.

Everybody in da club gettin’ tipsy.

when she looked towards where he was sitting he ran to the bathroom to hide.

And what was he doing in the bathroom? Given the M rating, only one thing comes to mind. Oh wait. He was hiding from a girl? That’s stupid.

Read the rest of this entry

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